There is simply too much for me to say even though I have a feeling it is to no one. I realize that I am not going to jump into a relationship. I am not ready I need to the single life to grow up. Although it maybe lonely it is the most fulfilling life I could think to live right now. I realize there is to much reflect in me to move on to a new person at the moment. I want to grow personally because I don't feel Kelli and I would have as good a chance later if I where to become stagnant. I want that shot and I can't lose by choosing to grow.
I know I will have almost two sides to me but everyone does because everyone is living the moment while living to reach something the have as a goal. This to me seems natural for people our age. To balance responsibility with freedom and childishness. My mind is all over the page tonight and I fear not writing in will forget anything I learn haha.
I will learn. That is how we move forward and grow ourselves.